Aaron Adams’s Blowhard Blog

At MWSF 2005, my heterosexual friend J Curtis decided that he would visit the massage booth on the show floor to relieve some of the muscle aches that inevitably develop after several days of walking on a concrete floor for hours on end. Since I happened to be the person with him at the time, he handed me the video camera and asked me to tape his massage so he could cut it into a funny little piece with some music under it for Your Mac Life. The one fly is this ointment that J didn’t count on is that the only person available at the massage booth at the time was a guy. J got into the chair, the masseur started rubbing his shoulders and neck, and I turned on the camera. It was apparent that J felt a little awkward, and the masseur wasn’t entirely happy that he was being videotaped giving a massage to another dude. When it was over, I snickered, J rolled his eyes, and the masseur probably took a break and called his girlfriend. I dubbed it MWSF 2005’s Most Homoerotic Moment, and then J made me promise not to mention it to anyone, which I haven’t, until now.

Fast forward one year to MWSF 2006. Steve Jobs is on the keynote stage speaking about the Intel transition, and then a cloud of smoke comes from behind the curtain. Paul Otellini emerges wearing a clean room suit and carrying a shiny metal disc. Paul gets right up close to Steve, looks him directly in the eye, and an exchange like the following takes place:

Paul: I’m ready, Steve.
Steve: I’m ready too, Paul.
Paul: Being trapped in this suit has made me so hot…
Steve: Let me hold your wafer.
(awkward pause)
Steve: What’s everybody looking at?
Audience: Nothing!

I never thought Steve was gay. Who knew? It was like Paul and Steve were going to start making out right there in front of everyone. Let’s be honest with ourselves: Steve has a lot of things most men his age don’t: A decent body, a ‘tude, and the coinsss grrrrl. snap snap He can definitely do better than Paul Otellini.

So I hereby dub Steve and Paul’s keynote voyeur show MWSF 2006’s Most Homoerotic Moment.